Reply With QuoteHow many country & western singers does it take to change a light-bulb???
Two - one to change the bulb, and the other to sing a song about how good the old one was....
How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light-bulb?????
One, but the light-bulb has to really, really, really, want to change....
Why is cheese?
How many country & western singers does it take to change a light-bulb???
Two - one to change the bulb, and the other to sing a song about how good the old one was....
Why is cheese?
Taken from the guiness book of records
Talking about Nothing
Mrs. Mary Caterham (GB) and Mrs. Marjorie Steele (GB) sat in a kitchen in Blackburn, Lancs. and talked about nothing whatsoever for four and a half months from 1st May to 7th August 1978, pausing only for coffee, cakes and toilet visits.
Throughout the whole time, no information was exchanged and neither woman gained any new knowledge whatsoever.
The outdoor record for talking about nothing is held by Mrs. Vera Etherington (GB) and her neighbour Mrs. Dolly Booth (GB) of Ipswich, who between 11th November 1983 and 12th January 1984 chuntered on over their fence in an unenlightening dialogue lasting almost 62 days until Mrs.Booth remembered she'd left the bath running.
.
Dithering…
The world record for dithering whilst shopping was set by Mrs. Beryl Bogwater on 18th July 2001 as she was shopping for a new dress in the Metro Centre, Gateshead.
After being tempted by the first dress she saw, she couldn’t decide whether or not to buy it. So she took her husband on an eighteen hour, eighty-four mile trek around the shops, looking at 8,466 other dresses, and trying on 2,891 of them.
Mr Bogwater attempted suicide on the 4,123rd occasion that his wife stopped to pick up an outfit only to declare, “I would never wear this…”, but he was too weak by this time to succeed.
Beryl eventually returned to the first dress she looked at, and bought it.
It is now in her side of the wardrobe, and she will wear it as soon as she gets back down to a size 12.
.
Gossiping
On February 18th 1992, Joyce Blatherwick, a close friend of Agnes Banbury popped round for a cup of tea and a chat, during the course of which she told Mrs. Banbury, in the strictest confidence, that she was having an affair with the butcher.
After Mrs. Blatherwick left at 2.10pm, Mrs. Banbury immediately began to tell everyone, swearing them all to secrecy.
By 2.30pm, she had told 128 people of the news. By 2.50pm it had risen to 372 and by 4.00pm that afternoon, 2774 knew of the affair, including the local Amateur dramatic Society, several knitting circles, a coachload of American tourists, which she flagged down, and the butcher's wife.
When a tired Mrs. Banbury went to bed at 11.55pm that night, Mrs.Blatherwick's affair was common knowledge to a staggering 75,338 people, enough to fill Wembley Stadium.
.
How many guitarists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Ten. One to change the light bulb and nine to stand about , muttering " I could have done that."
The style as we like is the humdrum.
Oh my, there's three of them now.
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, EVERYONE!
How many skeptics does it take to change a light bulb?
[no conferring]
The style as we like is the humdrum.
How many folkies does it take to change a light bulb?Originally Posted by Dr B
How many country & western singers does it take to change a light-bulb???
Two - one to change the bulb, and the other to sing a song about how good the old one was....
Six: one to change it, four to sing about how good the old light bulb was...
...and one to walk out because it's electric.
"You got to use your brain." - McKinley Morganfield
I keep getting this terrible feeling of deja woo.
[quote=Mojo ]
Shan't say it. Shan't...
The style as we like is the humdrum.
Are you sure the Metro Centre isn't out Blaydon way?
"You got to use your brain." - McKinley Morganfield
I keep getting this terrible feeling of deja woo.
Yes, the Metro Centre is close to Blaydon. Blaydon is on the Gateshead side of the river though.
.
I give in! :D
.
I don't believe the lightbulb needs changing
How many radical feminist extremists does it take to change a light bulb
none, it's a mans job!
Posting Permissions
Bookmarks